Tuesday, December 17, 2013

That's So Ravens

The last season of Bowls as we know it is upon us. Towson is set to play Eastern Washington this Saturday at 2pm in the FCS semifinals. (New Hampshire gets two-time defending champ North Dakota State in the Fargodome in the other semifinal game.) Auburn could continue the SEC's blah blah dominance if they blah blah Florida State and blah blah blah. West Virginia is 3-8; JMU is 6-6. They're sitting on their asses right now. The curse of my fandom has never been more real.

We're gonna get away from the college ball today and talk about a league where I'm not, for once, emotionally invested in any one team's success on the field. With a surprising number of teams not only alive but legitimately in the thick of the playoff hunt exiting week 15, it's time for some NFL dialogue.

In my best once-heralded, now-scolded Hank Williams Jr. voice: ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALLLLLLLL. (warning: terrible puns may follow. Consider yourself warned.)


Seahawks 23, Giants 0
Also Known as... Episode IV, A New Narrative

Here it is, ladies and gentlemen. This is your new juggernaut. A strong running game. A young and dynamic quarterback. A smothering defense which truly has playmakers at every level of the defense. A coach who is charismatic and brilliant, even if he doesn't pay too much attention to the small details. They can play in any weather in the playoffs, because playing in Seattle forces them to endure it throughout the entire regular season. And once the games that matter roll around, they only have to play one game outside of the pacific northwest. That'll be the Super Bowl, which they will win by a convincing margin. These are your new Patriots, people. Like them or hate them, you better accept it as reality.

That's all tied up rather neatly. But why? How are they so good? How are they so complete?

The Seattle Seahawks are a great example of how the unsexy business of front office sports management is so critical so success on the field. You've got to draft well, and you've got to be able to pull in one or two star free agents to finalize what you couldn't in April. Seattle doesn't have a stellar track record in front office management like, say, Baltimore (more on them later), so perhaps it's equal parts luck and actual talent evaluation here. Maybe it's all luck. Who knows. Regardless of why decisions were made, the Seattle front office brought in all the right parts, and their financial dominance on the spreadsheet has bulldozed a mile-wide path for them to run through on the turf. Examples:

Russell Wilson, QB
2013 Salary: $526, 217

Golden Tate, WR
2013 Salary: $630,000

Richard Sherman, DB
2013 Salary: $555,000

Brandon Browner, DB
2013 Salary: $555,000

Here's your youth movement core right here. Seattle can't afford to keep all these guys on the take forever, but while they've got them, it's four really nice pieces for well under $3 million dollars. And when you're talking about a salary cap that's a whopping $123,000,000 in 2013, you've barely scratched the surface of your spending limits.

Wilson is the one that everyone talks about. And I love Wilson's game. Loved him in college at NC State (except for an unfortunate bowl game where he took out a team I love much more... you can probably guess who that is). He's just as mobile as Kaepernick and RG3, but the difference is, he wants to throw the ball first. He knows he's a quarterback and not a runningback -- something you can't say for the other two on occasion. That's why you don't see any regression with him this season. He plays within himself.

Tate is the piece that I think gets dropped when his contract is up after this season. Seattle has other parts, and while Tate has been good for them in the Wilson era, he's not irreplacable, and probably not worth the money his agent asks for. He'd be a great number two piece somewhere else, like Kansas City or New England. Probably too much of an attitude for Belichick though.

Sherman is just phenomenal. I don't know that there's much more I can say other than getting him for that price is just larceny. By comparison, Darrelle Revis in 2013 makes $13 million, plus a $1.5 million roster bonus. And then there's Browner, who gets overlooked in Sherman's shadow but is a great playmaker himself.

Earl Thomas, DB
2013 Salary: $2.05 million


Russell Okung, OT
2013 Salary: $7.06 million

Part of the young core. Thomas is only 24 years old, and a blue-chipper from Texas who Pete Carroll said is "hitting his prime." Two-time Pro-Bowler. First team All-Pro in 2012 at free safety. Yeah, I'm not sweating his two mil. As for Okung, $7 million certainly isn't in line with some of these other rookie contracts, but for a potential franchise tackle, it's definitely worth it.

With those five on the hook for less than five million, Seattle is free to go out and grab some big names in free agency. Like...


Marshawn Lynch, RB
2013 Salary: $7 million

Percy Harvin, WR
2014 Salary: $11 million

Your two primary weapons going forward. I've listed Harvin's 2014 salary because his current salary was adjusted down in the contract because of the ACL injury he was rehabilitating from when he was signed. Through 14 games, BeastMode has 1,089 rushing yards and 11 touchdowns, which is why I told all of you that asked me for draft help in August to take him as your RB1. In a season of first-round disappointments, he's been one of the best. As for Percy, we're going to hear so many "Wilson-to-Harvin" references in the future, we'll start instinctively tasting coffee whenever it rains outside.


The Seachickens have it made, kids. They can't keep everything long-term, but for the next two or three years, it's Legion of Boom or bust.



Ravens 18, Lions 16
Also known as... Episode V, The Narrative Strikes Back




Maybe it's because I clearly don't fit neatly into the mould of a "traditional sports writer," but I really don't enjoy these BS narratives. And the narrative today is that Detroit is a lousy, lazy, undisciplined team that can't win close games or do the little things right. Meanwhile, Baltimore is an A+ organization from the owner on down that is catching fire at the right time and is the team no one in the AFC wants to play. Congratulations, you're now caught up on Sports Center through the end of the week. Go fly a kite with your girlfriend or something. You're welcome.

I don't deny that some of that is true, but it's silly to pretend it's that cut and dry. The Baltimore run game is average, at best; I'm not sure what's up with Ray Rice this season, but he's got 605 yards rushing through 14 games. His yards per carry average is pedestrian, too: 3.1 per tote. For perspective, Rice averaged 4.0 yards per carry in his next worst season (2010). He averages 4.3 for his career. Oh, and his rushing totals by season? Discounting his rookie year, he's finished with 1,100+ in four straight seasons. He's on pace to fall short of 700 in 2013, and you definitely can't blame that on his offensive line, which is playing like a top 5 unit in the league right now.

But it's not just Ray Rice that's been average. Just like his Alma Mater, Joe Flacco is meh. His receivers are meh. And his O-line is better suited for run blocking than pass protection. The only reason this Ravens team is now upgraded to "not-to-be-trifled-with" status is because the teams doing the trifling are the "Can they do anything right without Gronkowski?" Patriots, the "Uhh, are we sure this is an all-time great team?" Broncos, the "Our resume is a blank piece of paper" Bengals, the "We get blown out by any above-average team without Reggie Wayne" Colts, and the "In case you forgot, Alex Smith is still our quarterback" Chiefs.

That doesn't mean Baltimore is hapless. They have the most reliable kicking game in the NFL, and the defense has really gelled on the back end of the season. Torrey Smith is a good, not great No. 1 wide receiver, and Flacco shows flashes of brilliance every once in a while. But let's be honest about what happened last night in Detroit:

A well-run, well-coached organization with an established history of success scored no touchdowns but played great defense on the road. They eked out a gotta-have-it win on the foot of a 61-yard field goal kick. And if by chance that kick was eight inches to the right, almost nobody cares about the 7-7 Baltimore Ravens today.



Packers 37, Cowboys 36 (?)
Also known as... Episode VI, Return of the Narrative



If I hear one more frat boy wearing a backwards Redskins cap talk about how "totally not clutch" Tony Romo is, I'm going to pull a Van Wilder. I'll round up everyone I can find wearing a sea green Vineyard Vines button-down and feed them happy dog juice disguised inside dessert treats.

The Romo hate has gotten so out of hand, I don't even know how to address it anymore. Yes, Tony Romo threw a pick at the end of a game that sealed a loss. Yes, he threw two picks in the fourth quarter. And yes, the Cowboys blew a huge lead at to a Packers team that was led by Matt Flynn, who, let me remind you, was signed by Seattle, got beat out for the quarterback spot by "I haven't played one snap in the NFL yet" Russell Wilson, traded to and then subsequently cut by Oakland, and then cut again by a Bills team that preferred their third-string undrafted rookie quarterback from Washington State. Only a run-on sentence can truly unearth the depths of Matt Flynn's awfulness. But you know what's even worse than Flynn? The Dallas Cowboys playcalling, and the Dallas Cowboys defense, in that order.

Some of you might be saying, 'What? No! The defense is clearly the worst part of this equation!" And I don't fault you for thinking that way. To describe Kiffin's Cowboys defense as "sieve-like" is offensive to colanders everywhere. But even as bad as the defense in Big D  is, they still should have hung on to win that game on Sunday. Instead, with a double-digit lead, and a runningback who finished just shy of 150 rushing yards and a score, they opted to pass the ball in critical points instead of running the ball to burn clock. And that's not even mentioning the very impressive play on the ball Packers DB Tramon Williams made to seal the win after Green Bay's go-ahead score.

I don't know how much more clearly I can put it. Tony Romo did not lose that game. When your defense leaks yards and points like that and your coaches' playcalling is self-defeating, the quarterback can't be held but so accountable.

Amazingly, the Cowboys still control their playoff destiny, scheduled into a de facto NFC East championship game in Week 17 for the second season in a row.

Tony Romo can still change the false narrative on himself. But at this point, I'm just not sure anyone is willing to pay attention.

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Hangover: Football Season is Officially Disappointing (and unofficially over)

Perhaps I've been spoiled.

There was a Saturday late in 2005 when football really started to click for me. Where I really started to get into it, and never really looked back. Close friends (read: "captive audiences to my nonsense") have heard me wax about this one particular game, which I will remain forever fond of. Suffice it to say that, if you don't know off-hand which game I'm referring to, you should check the link and find some familiar names.

Because of that game and what it spawned for 7 and a half years to come... because of 70-33 and Rodney Landers and Scottie McGee and 21-16 and Pat White and Steve Slaton and literally never seeing a losing season in my entire football fandom, perhaps I've been spoiled.

That's not to say I haven't seen gridiron heartache. Maine's swinging gate 2-point conversion in double overtime in the first year of the new BFS. Suddenly being unable to beat Syracuse, of all teams. Freshman quarterback Justin Thorpe fumbling away a chance to upset No. 1 Richmond at the five-yard line with 30 seconds left in the game, down 21-17. Watching a lock for the Heisman lose five consecutive games before turning it around at Iowa no-one-is-impressed State and limping to a 7-5 regular season record. And of course, one game from 2007 that I won't even mention.

I can't help but shake this feeling that, though I've seen consistent success for years, things could have been far better. I'm talking National Championships, for both of my squads. JMU came so close in 2008, only to lose in the semifinals and stay mired in mediocrity throughout my entire undergrad career. West Virginia... well, that they were left out of the National Championship in 2007 is still something I'm hot about to this day. #weneedaplayoff.

But the fact that I'm sitting here, reflecting on perceived slights from an 11-2 season from six years ago tells you all you need to know.

I have been, quite unequivocally, an incredibly spoiled fan.


Stony Brook 41, JMU 38

This loss has been a long time coming. Ever since I noticed just how soft JMU's "soft zone" really is during the 2011 season, I have wondered: why doesn't every team throw the ball on every play against us?

No team has ever been able to run the ball particularly effectively against JMU. Seriously. Look it up. WVU? Dukes outgained them 188-121 on the ground. In ODU's playoff-killing, comeback win last November 17, the Monarchs finished with -4 yards. And yesterday, Stony Brook, for all their offensive dominance, didn't even reach 100 yards rushing. And that's playing from ahead, too, when you're supposed to be running the ball.

But passing is a different story. Maine was the first to really find the Dukes' kryptonite. They kept hitting that big tight end of theirs, riding him all the way to an improbable road win over an eventual playoff team, the crown jewel of their postseason resume. Villanova did it last year; ODU only had to do it for one half of a game to stamp out JMU's season. Delaware and New Hampshire, sure, they threw the ball around the yard to some extent earlier this season, but Stony Brook -- fucking Stony Brook -- they sold out for it, and in return, put up more points on the vaunted JMU defense than I'm pretty sure I've ever seen from an FCS school.

Fire Mickey Matthews or don't; I don't really care to talk about that. Yesterday, the problem wasn't a man -- it was a scheme. And until JMU drops this soft zone BS, until JMU is smart enough to even consider playing some press coverage at all, you can forget the playoffs. You can forget about the conference championships. Because any yahoo with a competent quarterback and a film room is going to drop 35 points a game on the Dukes, inside Bridgeforth Stadium or out of it.


Kansas 31, West Virginia 19

As of Friday, November 15, 2013, Kansas hadn't won a football game in 27 contests. Did you know that? I did.

Something else I knew: once Geno Smith, Tavon Austin, and Stedman Bailey left for the NFL after West Virginia's first year in the Big 12, things were going to get worse before they got better again.

WVU fans are rioting in the streets. Sort of like what's going on at JMU, only way more irrationally, with way less information and context. (And, obviously, stuff is on fire.) My twitter timeline was nothing but West Virginia doomsday language for most of yesterday afternoon and evening. Fire Dana Holgorsen after 3 years! The world is ending! You'd think the Obama administration bombed Appalachia a la Catching Fire.

To be honest, there aren't very many words I can pair together to describe the season West Virginia is having right now. We're running an air raid offense without a competent quarterback. That sort of spells disaster right there, doesn't it?

I'd like to see the people who looked down their nose at Bill Stewart's 9-4 seasons. 9-4 looks pretty good right now for those of us with old gold jerseys hanging on our bedroom walls.

Bottom line? Rich Rodriguez finished 3-8 in 2001. You may remember: he went on to do some particularly impressive things. Some seasons... it's just not your year.



Other scores and observations from this weekend:


Florida 14, No. 10 South Carolina 19

One of the only reprieves of this season has been watching how terrible the mighty Florida Gators are. Not that the SEC East is that much better.

No. 12 Oklahoma State 38, No. 24 Texas 13

This is your weekly reminder that West Virginia beat Oklahoma State.

Texas Tech 34, No. 5 Baylor 63

If Baylor makes it to the National Championship game, the high school class of 2014 will have a lot of future cardiologists in it.

Michigan 27, Northwestern 19 (3OT)

My friend Quincy and I had a bet going that there's no such thing as a boring triple overtime game. He now owes me a brand new Xbox One, and a lifetime's supply of Cook Out.

Indiana 3, No. 22 Wisconsin 51

The only reason I'm even bothering to mention this game is because Wisconsin ran for FIVE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-FOUR yards of offense. 554 yards rushing. That's unfathomable. I'm not sure I could run for 554 yards against an empty field.

Iowa State 10, No. 18 Oklahoma 48

If WVU loses to Iowa State in Morgantown in two weeks, seriously, someone better lock me in a padded cell.

No. 17 Central Florida 39, Temple 36

West Virginia 19, Kansas 31
North Carolina 34, Pittsburgh 27
Maryland 27, Virginia Tech 24 (OT)
No. 23 Miami 30, Duke 48

Seriously, basketball gods? What the fuck.

Kentucky 6, Vanderbilt 22

Vanderbilt and Duke are now both bowl eligible. In that spirit, the ACC and SEC are announcing the brand new Pocket Protector Bowl! Sponsored by the Apple Genius Bar. The winning team gets to hand out Gatorade swirlies, then lock the losing team members in their lockers for the entire off-season.

No. 4 Stanford 17, Southern Cal 20

Quite simply, Stanford defense couldn't get the same type of penetration they usually get in conference games.

Syracuse 3, No. 2 Florida State 59

Wow. Jameis Winston really raped Syracuse.

No. 1 Alabama 20, Mississippi State 7
No. 25 Georgia 38, No. 7 Auburn 43

I have been so thoroughly unimpressed by Alabama this year. I will be purchasing 83 pet war eagles next week, then planting one in each Tuscaloosa Townhouse where Crimson Tide players reside, framing them for both improper benefits with a local pet shop and consorting with potential enemy mascots. Only one is a capital offense inside the state of Alabama. Can you guess which one?




Programming note: I know it's basketball season. Full coverage of JMU's inauspicious start to their CAA title defense at UVA, plus the NIU invitational, is in progress. Check back later in the week for that; in the meantime, just yell BALL NIGHT on random Wednesdays and Sundays like you're Michael Wilbon.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Some Bye Week Thoughts on JMU, CAA

We're entering the meat of the college football season: Mid-October and beyond. Conferences are starting to take on some definition. Even after losing teams to realignment, the CAA seems as deep as it ever was, after a weekend where we saw the newcomers step up to the plate and look dominant in an out-of-conference matchup (Stony Brook @ Colgate) or at least like a live dog on the road (Albany @ Delaware).

Five Colonial teams are 2-1 or better, so after a little bit of JMU talk, I'll be walking through the CAA contenders and forecasting who'll be in or out of the playoffs.


#18 JMU 38, Richmond 31

So we're starting at home in Harrisonburg, obviously, with the not-as-close-as-the-score-looked win over the Richmond Spiders. And despite giving up 22 points in the 4th quarter, this was one of the best games I've watched JMU play in some time. The playcalling was dynamic, particularly in the second half. Dae'Quan Scott, Khalid Abdullah, and Daniel Brown all look like first-rate conference playmakers. Birdsong wasn't perfect, overthrowing a receiver early on and getting picked play by a safety playing center field, but looked lethal spinning the ball downfield in the second half. He still needs to learn how to throw the ball away -- I think I saw him unnecessarily run the ball out of bounds for a loss close to half a dozen times -- but the Dukes' signal caller really looked lethal out there for large portions of Saturday's game.

On defense, JMU gave up 423 passing yards through the air, but since UR also set a stadium record for pass attempts, I think you can likely write the yardage off as a function of playing from behind as well as the Spiders' offensive strengths. The Spiders have too much talent on offense for JMU to completely shut them down, but on Saturday, the Dukes truly looked like a successful "bend, don't break" defense. Richmond got past midfield several times, but couldn't put 6 up on the board until the fourth quarter when the game was already out of hand.
The pass rush was out in force last Saturday. Whether it was sacks or just forcing the UR offensive line to hold, JMU's defense did its job. It's going to give up big plays and it's going to give up yardage. But there's enough playmakers at all three levels of the defense to make big stops and force key turnovers, and that will be big throughout the rest of the regular season... and perhaps beyond.

As for Richmond, they're a decent teams suffering a bad fate. Their schedule gets awfully winnable after this, drawing Rhode Island, Stony Brook, and Albany over the next four weeks. They won't make the playoffs, but circle October 26 on your calendar. When Towson comes to Richmond and the Spiders are playing for pride, anything could happen.

And JMU, going forward? Well, the Dukes will need to survive Williamsburg on October 26, a game that will likely be a lot closer than people realize. If JMU gets caught looking past the Tribe toward a home showdown with undefeated Villanova on November 2, it could seriously jeopardize the Dukes' playoff chances... again.

I like JMU by double digits at home vs Stony Brook and at New Hampshire, and I'll give them the benefit of the doubt after a bye week at Bill & Mary. Assuming JMU splits with Nova and Towson, the Dukes are looking at a 9-3 overall record, with a 6-2 conference record. That's likely not good enough for a CAA title, but a 9-3 JMU team is a lock for the FCS playoffs... assuming they take care of business.



Delaware (5-2, 2-1 CAA)

The Hens have a somewhat high ceiling but a low floor, which is why you see them upend JMU, then get blown out by Maine and barely edge out Albany (the conference's worst team) at home. The Hens will get to 3-1 at Rhode Island this weekend, but with Towson, W&M, Richmond, and the annual rivalry game vs Villanova over the final four weeks, this teams nice start to conference play will ultimately be undone.

Verdict: Will not make Playoffs


Towson (6-1, 2-1 CAA)

The fightin' Rob Ambroses have the talent to win a conference title and go deep into the playoffs, but they've already lost a key matchup with Villanova at home. That means they'll need help from JMU and Maine/Delaware if they want to grab the CAA's automatic bid. I think that's probably too much to ask for. I don't see them finishing worse than 9-3, with all three losses coming in the heart of conference play. With 9 wins, a top-four CAA finish, and an upset win over the hapless UConn Huskies, Towson is locked into the playoffs.

Verdict: Will not win CAA; will make playoffs


Maine (5-1, 2-0 CAA)

You could play football in the Virginia High School League's Central District in Richmond and play a tougher schedule than Maine has this year. I don't know what kind of dirt the boys from Maine have on the league office, but this schedule is a gift from Walter Peyton himself. Maine travels to Philly for a road game with Villanova on October 26; that's going to be the big ole Black Bear's only loss. And if Nova stumbles down the stretch, Maine will be first in line to grab the crown at 10-2 with only one conference loss.

Verdict: Will not win CAA; will make playoffs


Villanova (4-2, 3-0 CAA)

Drawing Maine and JMU in back-to-back weekends is tough sledding for Villanova, particularly when they already played Towson. But what do you want me to do, feel sorry for them?

I like the Cats to win the CAA, but it won't be bloodless. They're going to lose at JMU. They're going to win the conference. But they're going to lose at JMU. Say it with me now kids. THEY'RE GOING TO LOSE AT JMU. RIGHT? AM I RIGHT? I'M RIGHT, RIGHT?

Verdict: Will win CAA


So there you have it. Four CAA teams make an expanded FCS playoff field. Sounds about right.

Monday, September 30, 2013

September Hangover

BREAKING NEWS: It's the last day of September. Hold your tears though, baby birds. Because I'm gonna feed you.


WVU 30, #11 Oklahoma State 21:

So what is the anomaly? The defensive domination of a high-flying Air Raid that hasn't scored 21 points or fewer since 2011? Or the 38-0 shutout embarrassment at the hands of Maryland, a team West Virginia hasn't lost to since dinosaurs roamed the Earth, that put most Mountaineer fans on the edge of a cliff, peering over the edge in search of greener pastures? How many more questions can I ask? And how many of them will be obvious run-on sentences? I DON'T HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS.

Seriously, I have no idea what to think of this team. None. In truth, I didn't even get to watch this game, as I was at work for most of it and then driving to Charlottesville to visit my suddenly collegiate little sister for the rest of it. Don't worry, though. Driving through Shenandoah National Park, the shoulders were just large enough for me to pull off the road every couple of minutes, and the 3G was just good enough for me to make out a late Darwin Cook interception, a ridiculous couple of plays leading to a game-clinching field goal attempt, and the small, but very real word "Final" scrawled across the top of my ScoreCenter app. 30-21, West by God.

This is likely the best (regular season) win of the Dana Holgy era, given how mediocre Texas has proved to be over the last two years. And I have no clue what that means. It's almost certainly going to nab us a couple of extra recruits, and cements Keith Patterson as defensive coordinator for at least the foreseeable future. It likely means Clint Trickett is the guy for the Mountaineers, solving the biggest (and maybe only) big question mark the team has faced this season.

But what it means more than all of these things is that WVU has an October 5 date with #17 Baylor in prime time, and it's now the biggest game of the season. Because if West Virginia can walk out of Waco with a win, then it's time to stop talking about a new head coach... and start talking about a potential Big XII championship.


Delaware 29, #14 JMU 22

Unlike the West Virginia game, I did get to catch at least the second half of this particular contest. Which is probably why they lost. The curse of my fandom, folks. It's real.

From my best estimates, it seems that the defense was legit and the offense was at least productive in the first half. But I'm really here to talk exclusively about the second half of this game, which is clearly where this game was decided. Let's break down some talking points here.

-Cameron Starke. I understand that he left four points on the board, missing an extra point and then a field goal at the beginning of the second half. Four points could have made a big difference too; in addition to the obvious momentum lost in the third quarter after the missed field goal, four extra points on the board means they only would have needed a field goal coming down the stretch. That changes up the atmosphere and the play-calling entirely. 

All that being said, this game is not Cameron Starke's fault. He is, by and large, a lights out kicker, the calibre of which a school like JMU probably has no business having. (Starke is a transfer PK from, guess where: West Virginia.) He's hit 47 and 48-yarders. Not in practice, either. In live games. I've seen him do it. There's plenty of FBS schools that wish they could unpack that kind of firepower, let alone schools at the championship subdivision. JMU enters every game with an advantage in the kicking game, and that's all Starke. He gets a pass from me.



One last thing with the kicking game. I would like to confirm with other football-heads that field goals, are not, in fact, extra point attempts?

Ahh, I see. Never mind. Sanity has been restored. Let's move on.


-Birdsong. The ceiling is so high here. Birdsong had three stand-out plays that I can recall in the second half. The first was a bullet that Birdsong threaded over the middle right between two UD defenders for a 20-yard pickup. The second was only a 5 or 6-yard scramble, but it was how he did it that was so explicitly incredible.


Stiff-armed him and threw him onto the ground mid-stride. I pissed my pants. I suppose it could have been the alcohol. But I'm pretty sure it was the Birdsong.

The third and most important thing that I noticed was the sacks. More than once, the offensive line allowed a sack in the second half, and as the pocket collapsed, Birdsong did something very important: he tucked the ball and went down. He didn't try to be Justin Thorpe. He didn't try to be a hero. Birdsong, likely under very specific instructions from his coaching staff, just protected the ball and took the sack.

Never forget, people: JMU quarterback Michael Birdsong has only eight more starts than I do. He's still growing. His ceiling is high, but for now, fans need to be patient with offensive shortcomings. Even in a loss, he looked pretty good. And he's only going to get better.

-Personnel use. Dae'Quan Scott ran the ball on the first play of the fourth quarter. He didn't get another touch the rest of the game. Either he injured himself, or that's a gross misuse of talent. You're only down one score, Mickey. You don't need to head into the two minute drill when there's 12 minutes left in the game.

-Trench play. Did JMU's D-line miss Sage Harold? I think they did. And while Jordan Stanton and Tyler Snow are arguably the two best players with a hand on the ground, it's hard to ignore the raw production that Harold gives JMU up front. JMU has made other team's offensive lines look like garbage, piling up sack statistics that are just stupid, yet they were held without a sack all game at Delaware. Our secondary is talented, but it's never been so raw that they could get by without pressure up front. See: all of 2012.

And the offensive line. You could argue the offensive line was the reason for the meltdown. They allowed four sacks, all in the second half, three of which came on third down. And the results of those three drives: missed field goal, punt which led to Delaware TD, punt which led to Delaware TD.

-Coaching. I don't even know where to start here. The apparent lack of halftime adjustments is inexcusable. This was a problem on Saturday; it was a problem at Akron; it was a problem with ODU last November; it's been a problem for a while, and I've only been watching this team since 2008. (side note: it wasn't much of a problem in 2008.)

As for playcalling: look, I understand Mickey had an epiphany over the off-season, that he wants to run more plays and be a more balanced offense. I understand that Mike O'Cain is now a large part of the picture and that he must receive credit and/or blame whenever playcalling is good and/or terrible. But the staff, as a whole, needs to sit down an develop an offensive identity. It's a different version of the same problem JMU suffered from last season. In 2012, JMU ran the wildcat, jet sweeps, zone reads, designed keepers, the option, reverses, and of course, the timeless, unforgettable "Dae'Quan Scott runs into the ass of [insert name of any offensive lineman here] for no gain" play. And yeah, believe me, that was openly mocked in the Bridgeforth Stadium press box.

One year later, JMU is throwing the ball all over the yard -- the Dukes have outgained every opponent so far this season, and usually by a pretty considerable margin -- but I still feel like this is a team that's just trying to do too much. Rather than master what it's good at, JMU just hopes it can sneak into the end zone after throwing its own kitchen sink at the other team on the field. So my question, which should have been asked years ago, is this:

How does a team that doesn't know what it's good at, expect to be any good?



Other scores and observations from this weekend:

No. 23 Wisconsin 24, No. 4 Ohio State 31

Great win and a big hurdle for the Buckeyes and Urban Meyer, who is gunning for a Saban-Meyer rematch.
Also, that game ball is gonna be worth a lot of tattoos.

No. 14 Oklahoma 35, No. 22 Notre Dame 21

I don't know how much more plainly I can say this: Notre Dame is not that good. They were an average team with 29 seniors and a severely overrated schedule last year; this year, they have neither.

No. 10 Texas A&M 45, Arkansas 33

Does this still count as an SEC game?

No. 12 South Carolina 28, UCF 25

The good news for UCF is that, despite the loss, they're still for my money the best non-AQ team in these United States.

The bad news for UCF is that they must live in constant fear of an impending invasion of Herpes-infested African monkeys.

UVA 3, Pitt 14

I was in Charlottesville on Saturday, right after the loss. They suck, and they know it. At least they're good at the other football.

Arizona 13, No. 16 Washington 31

Eat your heart out, Rich Rod.

USC 41, Arizona State 62

Rough loss for the fightin' latexes. However, I have the utmost confidence in Lane Kiffin as USC's head... well, fuck.

No. 6 LSU 41, No. 9 Georgia 44

If I've said it once, I've said it a million times: you've gotta love the SEC for their sturdy, reliable defensive prowess. They're not afraid to grind out wins.

Virginia Tech 17, Georgia Tech 10

Don't get excited, acolytes. Your team still sucks ass.

No. 21 Ole Miss 0, No. 1 Alabama 25

True story: twice last year, Nick Saban had a wet dream about winning a football game 25-0. He was upset when he woke up, though. Changing the sheets in his master bedroom took away from his recruitment time.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

JMU, Conference USA, and other September Shenanigans

About 9 days ago, I started hearing some JMU-to-Conference-USA rumors. No big deal. Rumors fly all the time.

About two days ago, though, I was still hearing them. In my experience, these rumors sweep over social media like wildfire, and are extinguished by the wet reality of truth in a matter of days. So to be hearing them a full week later was... notable.

Then, this afternoon, after a long day of pretending to build an online portfolio and mooching food off of relatives, my former Breeze Sports co-editor Wayne Epps Jr. directed me to this page on the CSN message boards. The ethos doesn't exactly jump off the page at you, but the fact that this potentially informed person was echoing other things I heard was enough to make me sit up off the couch, pause my second Skyrim play-through, and make a few phone calls. The Stormcloak Rebellion can wait.

Before I did anything, I confirmed some information I've been sitting on for a while, as long as did some research into some other topics. They are as follows:


  • The Carr Report is completed, and has been for some time.

    Many of you have heard about a feasibility report headed to the JMU Board of Visitors that will supposedly recommend or advise against a move for the Dukes to the Football Bowl Subdivision. What you might not know is that this report has been complete for several weeks. While a few members of the Athletic Department have seen bits and pieces, the only person that I know of who has seen the report in its entirety is athletic director Jeff Bourne, and he will be the one to present the report to the BoV next Friday, October 4. It is that same Friday that JMU supposedly will announce its move to the C-USA, if you buy into the rumors which are currently circulating.
  • JMU has an open-ended offer from the Sun Belt that can be accepted at any time.

    Details may have changed since I last heard about this, but the gist of it is that the Sun Belt is interested enough in JMU that they have extended an offer to the athletic department that can be accepted at any points. They feel very strongly that JMU can significantly raise the profile of their conference and are showing their faith with a convenient, if desperate, offer. JMU hasn't accepted this offer as of yet, and I would think that, if they were to, they would at least wait until the Carr Report comes down. However, I have a hunch JMU has its sites set higher than the Sun Belt.
  • ODU is actively campaigning for JMU to join Conference USA.

    I don't like how it looks -- like big brother ODU, who has played football for all of three years and four weeks, is pulling us up to their esteemed level, and oh thank you, blessed sons of Norfolk, for doing us such a favor in our time of need! But at a certain point, I'm guessing Leonardo DiCaprio would have let anyone, even his worst enemy, throw him a lifejacket.. if it meant he could keep making out with Kate Winslet. (Kate Winslet, in this case, is a bigger TV deal.) Both AD Wood Selig and head football coach Bobby Wilder have been on the record in the media, trying to pressure their new conference into adding JMU. It's hard to ignore their logic: JMU makes for natural rivals with Marshall, ODU, and ECU. And Charlotte, if they ever get any good. Based on last Saturday, that rivalry might be a ways off, though.
  • Conference USA officials have experimented with a 16-team conference model, and have made trips to JMU in the recent months.

    I'm still working on nailing down exactly when officials were on campus, but I do have credible information that they were here and came away impressed with the facilities. And why wouldn't they be? A brand new athletics park, an engaged campus, a premier FCS football stadium, and let's not forget the sexy, ninth-ranked DC market to slip their grubby little hands into.

So what does all that add up to? Well here's what it likely doesn't mean: an imminent decision to move to Conference USA. After a long talk with one notable source in the Athletic Department, it would be wholly irresponsible for the BoV to hear the Carr Report and vote on a cataclysmic Athletics move all in the same day. Furthermore, the BoV hasn't scheduled a vote on anything in the near future, and the University can't announce a move without approval from the board.

But the most damning reason why you shouldn't expect any big JMU news next week is because they're too invested in their own success. As much as JMU may need to move up to stay viable in the long term as an athletic program, it almost certainly won't force its own teams into an ineligible season when its Men's Basketball, Women's Basketball, and Softball teams have legitimate chances to win their conference.

That doesn't mean you won't see a move up this year. JMU has until June 1 to announce any intentions to swap conferences, which leaves a nice 2-4 week period after all the conference tournaments where JMU can announce any C-USA plans, for next year, penalty free. Even if the decision comes internally by next Friday, I expect no official announcements will come in the immediate future. Given that the suddenly resurgent men's basketball team has a chance to defend its title and return to the NCAA tournament, it's hard to imagine the school throwing that opportunity away.

Monday, September 2, 2013

The Glorious Return of... The Hangover

BEFORE WE GET THIS YEAR'S FIRST HANGOVER STARTED: I have taught myself how to embed tweets into my blog posts. You are about to drown in a torrent of my own self-absorbed hilarity. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.


#19 JMU 38, Central Connecticut State 14

On one hand, I'm kind of surprised the Dukes only rang up 38 points against CCSU, a team whose defense was leakier than the Flying Dutchman last year. It's supposedly improved this year. So is West Virginia's. I digress.

It's hard to really take a lot away from this game, not only because of the opponent, but because of the way the game, particularly the second half, unfolded. But some of the things I saw that I liked:


-The play-calling. My goodness, the play-calling. I am a cow over the fucking moon with the play-calling. There were sweeps, dives, screens, and, wait for it, passes 10+ yards down the field! Most importantly, it was all very well mixed together, it was at pace, and it was executed, to the most part, with a high degree of efficiency and effectiveness. This is what a non-stagnant offense looks like. For too many years now, JMU has coasted by on poor play calling because of the caliber of athlete the program attracts. I won't get all worked up over one game against a directional school from a state the size of large Arby's, but Mike O'Cain clearly passes his first test. If Mickey gives him that sort of creative control over the offense all year, this team will make the playoffs. It's that simple.

-Let's stick with the offense. Birdsong is bull-headed, which I think is mostly a good thing. He said something sort of poignant in the post-game press conference along the lines of 'I'm 240 pounds, and if I can go one-on-one with some DB, I'm going to run his ass over.' I'm paraphrasing here, but the takeaway was starkly unlike the typical QB towline of Slide first, ask questions when you miss the first down line later.

For the most part, I think this is a good thing. Maybe it means MB doesn't know his own value to the team; maybe it doesn't. And while it's true JMU is startlingly barren behind Birdsong at quarterback, what this probably just means is that Mike is big, he knows it, and his legs are just a potent a weapon on offense as his arm is.

-Dae'Quan Scott, God love him, actually said after the game that he felt it was the worst game of his career. Child, please. You had 197 all-purpose. You ran a punt back 57 yards for a touchdown. And, oh yeah:


Yeah, I break news occasionally. So what? This moment is about Dae'Quan. Stop trying to take this away from him, cynical reader.

-There were ten caught passes. Eight players registered a reception. That is all.



-On defense: Dean Marlowe and Stephon Robertson were, well, they were Dean Marlowe and Stephon Robertson.

Robertson led the team in tackles, along with redshirt freshman Gage Steele, part of the much-heralded #1 recruiting class. We all know Robertson is a beast, but Steele is a new commodity. It seems his natural position is middle linebacker, like what Robertson plays, but JMU has moved him to weak-side LB because, let's be real, a freshman isn't unseating an All-American.

-The defense was so lights out in the second half that offense basically didn't play. Let's recap:

On the opening drive of the second half, CCSU throws an incomplete on third and 4. Blue Devils punt the ball. Scott returns ball for touchdown.

Next possession: thanks to an offside penalty, CCSU moves up from 3rd and 9 to 3rd and 4. Commence Bridgeforth getting loud as hell. Two consecutive false starts push Blue Devils back to 3rd and 14. Blue Devils QB Andrew Clements, now getting desperate, launches a prayer 20 yards down the field, which became said filthy, ball-hawking Dean Marlowe interception. JMU kicks field goal.

Next possession: On third and 10, Clements again launches one, this time 30 yards downfield. Same result: picked off by quarterback-turned-cornerback Taylor Reynolds, returned for a touchdown.

Next possession: Look, the JMU defense is only human. They've literally been on the field the entire third quarter thus far, and they're staring down the barrel of yet another possession. CCSU runs 13 plays and 8 minutes off the clock... yet they only make up 35 yards. Even when they're tired, this defense is pretty good, it seems.

-The Crowd! Hell Yes! Go crowd go! Be all that you can be!

The student section was rocking the entire first half and into the third quarter. The north end zone was also filled out, which is where I often see some of the more lackadaisical fans/empty pockets. The only empty parts I saw were in the upper decks, which is acceptable for CCSU. I get it. ESPN has a bigger campus than Central Connecticut. Fine. As long as we're full for big home games (looking at you, Villanova), my bitching will be at a minimum.


Given the circumstances, I find this to be acceptable.



Obviously I'm nitpicking, and I thought overall JMU turned in a solid performance on Saturday, but briefly, some of the things I wasn't so fond of:

-There was no pass rush. AGAIN. JMU recorded 8 tackles for a loss, but if you look where they're coming from, it's a lot of linebackers and safeties, and not so much from guys coming unchecked up front. That being said, Defensive End and FOTB Tyler Snow was held out with a hamstring issue. I'm told he's doubtful to play at Akron, which is a major loss for another FCS upset bid. Mickey called him after the game "the most solid player" on JMU's defense. Big words when you have conference POY's in your linebacking corp. Still, I'm convinced that the pass rush will improve when Snow does.

-Hold onto the ball. Put gorilla glue on your fingers and rip them off at the end of the season. Wear Andre's ridiculous grippies (mandatory The League reference: check). Just hold on to the ball, for God's sake.

-Not crazy about bend, don't break coverage against CCSU. We have superior players and athletes all over the field. We can afford to cover receivers a little more tightly.

-We have GOT to figure out how to cover tight ends. JMU has been straight up bad covering tight ends ever since I got to Harrisonburg, and there were signs of that trend continuing. Teams know this about JMU by now. I don't know if it's mixing schemes or double-coverage, but we've got to do something other than just let tight ends crush us over the middle for 15 yards at a time.

-Stupid fans. I have ranted about getting fans into the game and leaving early. Now, I need you all to educate yourselves!



We all need goals, I guess.



West Virginia 24, William & Mary 17



That's pretty much all I have to say on that, lest I relapse back into a rage-fueled state of fanaticism that can't process a blue and gold number being less than a green and gold number, much less the implications of an A-gap blitz on a passing down.


I probably have a couple of quips left in me, but honestly, it's just lots of making fun of Virginia Tech. Oregon State lost? That's going to turn into me making fun of Virginia Tech. Kansas State lost? Nope, Virginia Tech. JMU is playing Akron next week? Nope, Virginia Tech.


I'll have the pregame up Friday evening, and I'm shooting for my annual 10 Things: NFL predictions midweek. Until then, may you tailgate preparations be swift and just.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Sunday Showcase: No Thanks, Sun Belt

(The following is part of a summer mini-series that will showcase old Breeze columns regarding JMU football that are still relevant. The series will reach its apex in mid-August, when I release my 2013 JMU football primer, forecasting the successes and failures of the 2013 team and commenting on the state and direction of the program.)


The Name: No Thanks, Sun Belt

The Date: April 4, 2013

The Idea: Conference realignment is an undeniable, unignorable problem that must be addressed, lest JMU fall into the bowels of irrelevance that FCS football seems destined for. As more and more championship subdivision powerhouses make the jump up, is the southern-centered Sun Belt really the right move for a burgeoning program in Harrisonburg, Virginia?

The Unedited, Original Version:


Let's play a word association game. When I say Sun Belt, you think of ... what?


I think of seventh grade history with Mr. Douglas. The Bible Belt. According to the lazy college student's bible (aka Wikipedia), the Bible Belt is "an informal term for a region in the south-eastern and south-central United States in which socially conservative evangelical Protestantism is a significant part of the culture and Christian church attendance across the denominations is generally higher than the nation's average."

So it makes sense, then, that the Sun Belt Athletic Conference has a pair of schools in Alabama, Arkansas and Louisiana.

Unfortunately for the Sun Belt, that's about all that the conference has, as six member institutions (Denver, Florida Atlantic, Florida International, Middle Tennessee State, North Texas and Western Kentucky) have left or announced that they will soon leave since the beginning of 2012.

But the Sun Belt has a plan. The conference will restock on Football Championship Subdivision powerhouses, loading up on meaty carbs like Georgia Southern and (Cr)App State. Whoops, how'd that parenthetical sneak in there? I suppose old habits die hard.

And, as reported by SB Nation, the embattled Football Bowl Subdivision conference has JMU next in line for an invite, should the Sun Belt suffer another departure.

Woah, now. Home girl say what? JMU is going to be in a conference with Idaho and New Mexico State? I've got some concerns.

JMU fans everywhere are losing their minds with excitement, demanding that JMU Athletics join hand in hand with the Sun Belt and sing Kumbaya. The Colonial Athletic Association is crumbling into that little ball of lint you found in your pocket during your cousin's wedding last summer, and JMU, sooner or later, is going to need a lifeboat off the Titanic.

Could this be a message from God, to JMU, to join the Sun Belt? We are, don't forget, talking about the Bible Belt.

Unfortunately, it is my firm theological belief that, even in Ordinary Time, God doesn't care where JMU plays its football. While the Sun Belt holds an uber-sexy annual matchup with Appalachian State (go Google "Rodney Landers," kids) and a move to FBS could instantly renew the potential juggernaut that is the Old Dominion-JMU Royal Rumble, it's probably not the right conference for JMU academically, culturally or geographically.

For example, the vast majority of JMU alumni live north of the North Carolina-Virginia border up into New England. Why would we play in a football conference that exists almost solely south of that border?

JMU's peer institutions are schools like William & Mary and Drexel. Should we replace them with Texas-Arlington and South Alabama?

That's all prologue to the shitstorm of Title IX implications a move to FBS would cause JMU. We'd need to add 22 new football scholarships alone, which would require 40 or 50 new scholarships for female athletes in turn. JMU would need to explore adding more sports into the mix, just at the theoretical baseline of playing in an FBS conference.

Unless Johnny Alger and Jeffrey Bourne plan to go Bonnie and Clyde on the Harrisonburg Savings and Loan -- I guess you can decide which one gets to be Bonnie -- I'm not sure where JMU can come up with this money. Don't forget, that's all on top of financing new building renovations, combatting tuition hikes and addressing the ignored-for-far-too-long salary issues of professors across the board.

I'm not saying JMU should sit on its laurels and do nothing but watch conference realignment pass it by. If anything, this administration's perceived apathy and disinterest in realignment is what has fans so worked up about a potential move in the first place.

What I am calling on all fans to do, whether you are a wide-eyed freshman or a seasoned 25-year alumnus, is not to speak out of ignorance. JMU finds itself in a tenuous situation; at some point in the near future, JMU athletics must land somewhere, or at least drastically shift the perception of the CAA as a dying brand by adding strong (read: not the College of Charleston) members to the conference.

But none of that makes it acceptable to buck at the first carrot dangled in front of this administration's faces. My rule of thumb: If it sounds like a gay man's fashion accessory, it's probably not the most viable of conference choices for JMU.

JMU has months, maybe even a couple years, to hammer out a financial action plan of how to handle a jump to the FBS level. Whether it's in the Sun Belt or a more apt location (like potentially the Mid-American conference), these challenges must be recognized and appropriately game-planned for.

At some point FBS football is going to come calling. As a community, we can't say "no" forever.





The Reception: While I did get plenty of laughs at the "gay man's fashion accessory" and the "Bonnie and Clyde" jokes, this column did not play well with a lot of alumni. Somehow, lots of JMU graduates got ahold of this column and didn't seem very fond of it. Some of the public responses:


"This reads like a message board rant. Let's not masquerade as a sports writer with unreadable opinion pieces like this. " -Richard Sines, Charleston, SC

"Speak for yourself. Most Alumni want this move. We are the ones that fund this University...   You've got it all wrong young college student. You take the better job, and then leave that job when the MAC comes calling." -Christopher McGowan, JMU alum

"Not to burst your lofty bubble, but from way out here on the west coast, we lob Virginia along with the rest of the 'Bible Belt.' Can you say Lynchburg?... GO SPARTANS!" -Chuck Gruber, San Jose State

"Hey Duke Fans! You all belong in the ACC.... for obvious reasons... natural fit... AND, with Maryland leaving, the DC Market is devoid (or soon will be), devoid of of [sic] an ACC Team. Its all about the money." Jeff Butchko, JMU alum/Clemson fan



Of course, I can't respond to anyone who ever gives me feedback. And I certainly wouldn't stoop to the level of entertaining some of these ridiculous responses...

Oh, who the fuck are we kidding? Yes I will.


-Chuck: Lynchburg hasn't been relevant since Jerry Falwell was alive. Stick to procuring 19th century French Merlots for the private selection of the winery that I'm sure that you own. Or better yet, continue to support that great University of yours. Is a San Diego State grad really the one to be giving advice on how to be relevant in sports?


-Jeff: while I admire the optimism, how many times has your mom had to tell you to stop drinking and posting things on the Internet? Do it again, and she's probably going to take away your computer privileges.

-Christopher: I agree completely with you, sir. Let's just say, to hell with it, jump to the Sun Belt, and then jump somewhere else when we get a better opportunity! I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier. It's a rather genius plan, because we don't need to spend any time worrying about geographic or cultural fits, whether or not it's the right plan short or long-term for the university. Let's just do it! And figure out the consequences later.

And the student-athletes? Well, who gives half a shit about them, right? I mean, they are just dumb jocks, after all, so just throw them around like they're chess pieces. Send the women's soccer team on a plane to Idaho for three days. Some day, the cost of all those $50,000 trips might be a tax write-off. And the kids will miss class, sure, but they don't need degrees anyway, right? They'll make millions on the professional women's soccer circuit, which is why you always see so many female athletes with zero career ambition. And they can make that class time up when they're ineligible to compete in postseason tournaments. Twice.


-And Richard, oh Richard: it reads like a sports opinion piece, because it is a sports opinion piece. If you'd taken 8 seconds to look into my background as a writer, you'd have realized that I write sports opinion pieces. Not only that, but plenty of people seem to like my tone and carefully formed opinions, including some people over at the Society of Professional Journalists. They gave me this tiny little award that says I may actually know what I'm doing. But hey, let's not masquerade as anyone with any sort of conceivable intelligence, right?


Man, I really shouldn't let that stuff build up for 4 months at a time. It appears I can be somewhat ugly, and perhaps even sarcastic, when provoked.

I do want to recognize one gentleman by the name of Bill McDonnell who called me out on something important. I refer to the Sun Belt as the "first carrot" being dangled in front of our collective faces, which was a sloppy mistake of mine. In truth, at the time this was published, I technically had no idea whether it was the first, second, or 19th carrot dangled in front of JMU. In early April, the JMU/Sun Belt news reverberated loudly through the Valley, and with frighteningly mixed results. (It seems the only thing JMU fans can agree upon is that we can't agree on much of anything.) But if there were other offers, they were quiet. The Sun Belt talks were the only ones loudly made public-- but that doesn't mean they were the only ones in existence.

Where Bill is a bit mistaken is that he operates under the impression that JMU "had many opportunities to move up to FBS over the years and chose not to make the leap. Our administration and athletic director should have been planning for this move many years ago but have done nothing except sit back and let other lesser universities move ahead of us." This, as I have learned, is not true.


The Relevance Today: Realignment hits at the heart of nearly every issue JMU faces in 2013. What Bill and many, many other fans fail to realize is that athletics decision-making is not a static process that occurs in a vacuum. There are plenty of factors, and even more people, outside of athletics that must be considered.

But if you look hard enough, there is a line of events and circumstances that traces back to the group's consistent reasoning for every decision made in the realignment era. This, I know.

But what is that reasoning? And is it still relevant? That is what I hope to delve into next weekend with the conclusion of this mini-series. I'll be making some JMU football predictions for this season, even with one less appendix on the team than this time seven days ago. More importantly, I will reveal some information I have uncovered over the past 4 months that may shed some light on past decisions and could even forecast future ones.

Man, that was some heavy stuff. Is it tailgating season yet? I long for the season where day-drinking is socially acceptable in any parking lot. Someone throw me a beer.

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Sunday Showcase: Football Postscript, 2012 (November 29, 2012)

(The following is part of a summer mini-series that will showcase old Breeze columns regarding JMU football that are still relevant. The series will reach its apex in mid-August, when I release my 2013 JMU football primer, forecasting the successes and failures of the 2013 team and commenting on the state and direction of the program.)


The Name: JMU Football Postscript

The Date: November 29, 2012

The Idea: With a potential automatic bid to the FCS playoffs on the line, JMU shit the bed in the second half against ODU and finished 7-4... again. Four years after a national semifinals, fans have only witnessed one playoff appearance. The Class of 2013 will have never have seen a home playoff game. Is it time for a harsh evaluation of JMU's beloved football team on an organization-wide level?

The Unedited, Original Version:

As I sat watching this week’s Monday Night Football game between the Eagles and the Panthers with a few friends from Philadelphia, I started taking mental notes as to why the Eagles are so very bad this year. But there’s so many things inexplicably wrong with this team, it’s hard to find a good starting point.
Injuries to the offense have hampered the Eagles’ runningback LeSean McCoy and quarterback Michael Vick. Even when he is fully healthy, Vick – a signal caller who is as athletically gifted as they come – struggles to make pre-snap reads and seemingly routine throws. He often seems ill-suited to be running an offense at this level.
On defense, a star-studded cast of playmakers underperforms as key personnel aren’t living up to preseason hype. The secondary struggles to cover people effectively, and a supposedly elite pass rush fails to pressure the opposing quarterback nearly every weekend.
Clock management is a constant source of frustration for fans, some of whom are calling for their head ball coach to be fired. Andy Reid is a great guy with a winning record and a history of success in Philadelphia; it seems impossible that such a beloved man who has become the face of an organization could actually be fired.
Hey JMU fans … does this sound eerily familiar?
Everything I’ve just listed is 100 percent true of the National Football League’s most perplexing team, but it also reads a bit like an anatomy of JMU football in 2012. Why is it that a team with literally everything at its disposal can’t even make the playoffs, albeit in the country’s toughest conference? Thousands of fans asked themselves this on a chilly drive home from Harrisonburg two weekends ago, and most are still ruminating on the subject now.
As fans, we have a pathological need for answers that quench our disappointment. Unfortunately, it’s in the fabric of sports that we rarely, if ever, receive them.
Plenty went wrong in the confines of Bridgeforth Stadium this year that has nothing to do with JMU or head coach Mickey Matthews. Injuries up front eroded a pass rush that could have been extraordinary. In my discussions of JMU football with former players and fans, a few keen observers have highlighted the departure of Strength and Conditioning coach Jim Durning as a behind-the-scenes factor in the program’s performance.
The meteoric rise of Old Dominion’s football program has hurt the Dukes in the loss column as well as the recruiting field.
The schedule, while fan-friendly, did very little to beef up the program’s out-of-conference resume, an important factor when the Football Championship Subdivision playoff committee is deciding which girls to ask to the prom.
But Matthews and his staff cannot be absolved of all responsibility. The lack of a forward passing game at JMU has become so publicly mocked, it’s nearly cliché. Calling plays out of the shotgun in short yardage situations has become an inexplicable regularity. The defense, for all its talent, simply couldn’t cover anyone, and incomplete passes were often a result of happenstance rather than actual defensive prowess.
Most damningly, the offense failed to develop an identity as quarterbacks were shuffled and reshuffled like so many decks of cards. Mix in the option, the wildcat, zone-reads, trick plays and numerous other play calls, and it’s unclear as to whether JMU oversees a football program or a Bertie Botts Every Flavored Bean factory.
As a result, JMU message boards are full of young alumni, living in their Northern Virginia lofts, parading on about how Mickey Matthews should be fired as soon as yesterday. They should get back to their cubicle and concentrate on their spreadsheets, because inducing a coaching panic is the last thing the program needs right now.
While the expectations weren’t met and the class of 2013 will graduate without ever seeing a home playoff game, Coach Matthews deserves the trust of this fan base. I’m not a believer in national championships buying free rides, but there just isn’t enough here to trade Coach Matthews for someone who will only see JMU as a stepping stone.
In return, I don’t want to ever hear the words “a lot of teams would kill to be 7-4.” I’ve heard this from coaches, players and fans alike, and it must stop now. While it’s true that Northwestern Wyoming Polytechnical Center would kill for a 7-4 season, we’re not just any team.
JMU is a premiere organization in FCS football, and it’s high time we started acting like it.
 
 
 
 
The Reception: All over the place, as was expected. Like any good base, JMU fans shine resplendent with apathetics and diehards, critics and unconditionalists. Some fans were (and still are) dying to see someone not named Mickey Matthews calling the plays; whether or not this upcoming season will satiate their appetites for pass plays remains to be seen. Some fans believe it to be purely happenstance that JMU hasn't been truly good since 2008. However you see it, there's certainly enough blame to around, from one Linwood Rose all the way down to freshman backup safeties.
Let's all just agree that, if you live in a DC loft, you probably suck.
 
 
The Relevance Today: I've seen Coach Matthews two or three times this summer, and each time it's been at a bar next to my townhouse. We exchange pleasantries each time, and while I certainly won't begrudge ole Mick a beer or three, I hope he realizes how serious the fan base is getting about his job status. I stand by my statement that trading Mickey in for some successful up & comer like, say, Towson's Rob Ambrose, is a waste of nearly everyone's time. While I thoroughly enjoyed meeting Mr. Ambrose last season, and he's a great, well-spoken, and immensely likable fellow... well, if Rob Ambrose is still at Towson in eight years, I'll cheer for Pitt. It's like that, America.
But just because Mickey's staying power is valuable to me doesn't mean he's invincible. Last year's injuries along the defensive line made it clearer than ever to me that JMU needs a stronger S&C program, as I mentioned in the original piece. An alumnus of the 2004 national championship team has made that much clear over on jmusb, and he's hardly the only person to mention that as a former strength that has become a weakness. Pun 100% intended. 
Kidding aside, if JMU didn't have a bona fide Buck Buchanan award contender sitting in the middle of the linebacking corp, who knows what havoc might have been wrought upon the purple-and-gold-clad last season.
And the offense simply must find new ways to be dynamic this season. There's just no way around it. I think Michael Birdsong will be airing it out more this season. JMU will once again have potential superstar Andre Coble back in the mix after he missed last season due to academic ineligibility, but with the departure of centerpiece Brian Barlow, who knows how this group of receivers will fare? A new OC and quarterback might change things, but only if Mickey is willing to loosen up his vicegrip on controlling the offense, and the program as a whole is unafraid to pursue bold play-calling, such as the first half of the ODU game last November.
JMU has the stature, recruiting, personnel, and ability to contend for a national championship, this year and every year. The only question that remains is whether they put it all together, or let it fall apart again.
Well, I suppose there's that tiny question of whether or not JMU will, you know, ditch the CAA for FBS football, forever changing the entire landscape of collegiate athletics as the next big domino to fall in the cascading torrent that is conference realignment. But hey: that's what next Sunday is for, right?

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Sunday Showcase: An Absence of Diehards (November 1, 2012)

(The following is part of a summer mini-series that will showcase old Breeze columns regarding JMU football that are still relevant. The series will reach its apex in mid-August, when I release my 2013 JMU football primer, forecasting the successes and failures of the 2013 team and commenting on the state and direction of the program.)


The Name: An Absence of Diehards

The Date: November 1, 2012

The Idea: With a nationally relevant program and the best stadium in FCS football, why the hell do fans, particularly students, suck so much this season?

The Unedited, Original Version:


Is there a kegger somewhere?
We had three home football games in the month of October, and I’ve never quite seen fans leave games early like they have in the last 31 days. The miraculous Justin Thorpe comeback against Towson University was well-watched, sure. There was nary a crowd member in all of 25k-strong Bridgeforth that would have been caught dead leaving that game before the clock reached all zeros.
But William & Mary? From my perch in the press box, I witnessed droves of student fans leaving the game with a tie game at the end of regulation. People are saying “thanks but no thanks” to free football. That is concerning.
Perhaps it was just an aberration. Surely students would stick around for a homecoming game featuring a brand new, starting freshman quarterback?
Naturally, the end result was different than what I expected. The stadium was half empty by the third quarter, and Colonial Athletic Association cellar dweller Georgia State nearly ran out of vaunted Bridgeforth Stadium with a win. Part of the reason for the comeback? JMU’s normally ferocious home-field noise was quiet enough to pass for Sunday mass with Father O’Leary.
What is going on? Why have people suddenly lost interest in the end of pretty tightly contested games? Is something else going on that is distracting students from the boys of fall?
I return to my previous inquiry: Is there a kegger somewhere?
In fairness to you deserters, last Saturday was cold and rainy, and it featured an offensive performance that wafted back and forth between offensively challenged and atrociously hard to watch.
On the other hand, screw fairness. I have a personal 35-point slaughter rule, and I will leave only in the event of a comeback-is-beyond-impossible type of blowout. But until then? Cancel my dentist appointment and bring me a parka because I’m like the US postal service. I’ll be in the stands rain or shine, sleet or hail.
That’s the type of attitude JMU fans seem to be missing this year, that devil-may-care, to-Hell-with-it-if-I-catch-a-cold attitude. I’m certainly not the only avid football fan in Harrisonburg, yet I’ve talked to dozens of alumni who all wonder the same thing.  Where did all the diehards go?
My investigation concludes with the new student ticket system. It’s got to go.
I don’t want to sound like an old man here, but back in my day, getting a football ticket required some advanced planning skills. Tickets went up for grabs on the Monday 12 days before a football game, and when they ran out of seats, it was better luck next time. Maybe instead of doing something futile like “paying attention in your 8AM,” you should have been on your laptop reserving yourself a seat at the Homecoming game.
The result was a palpable desire to snag football tickets on Mondays and a total feeling of being letdown if you were too slow on the draw. That showed on game days, as students were ready to be loud for a full three and a half hours. They were emotionally invested in their tickets and the planning required to obtain them.
Instead, I now watch freshmen prance up to the library half an hour before kickoff to print off a ticket for entry. It’s maddening, and it’s got to stop.
I can’t make people care about JMU football. As much as I’d like, this strongly-worded letter will likely fall on deaf ears, and people will leave the Nov. 17 ODU game early, if they show up at all. The athletic department is likely at a loss too, quietly shuffling papers and whispering as to how they can keep this new breed of student in the stands through the fourth quarter. Should they drop money from the sky like Georgia State does? Would that even work? Probably not.
Maybe they should throw a kegger at halftime.
 
 
The Reception: Putting aside my Boston Marathon sign-off, this is arguably still my most popular column to date. This was part of the portfolio that won me Regional Sports Columnist of the year, and it was well-received by many fans of the program as well as members of both the athletic and alumni outreach/annual giving departments. It's well-documented that I love to receive hate mail, but I don't mind positive feedback either, and this got plenty of it. When The Breeze posted this on its Facebook page -- a rare get for me, because the Breeze Web moderators usually like to distance themselves from my writing style -- it got TONS of likes and comments, sparking a conversation that actually rolled through the ODU game mentioned above. This was the rare column that may have actually had an impact beyond garnering a few laughs with strangers.
 
The Relevance Today: This upcoming season is a critical period for JMU athletics. If the University has any designs of moving up to the FBS level in the near future, JMU fans must show strong support of the programs they claim to care so much about.
JMU plays Akron in September. Some people have told me, "It's only Akron, what's the big deal?" And if you have said that, then Congratulations, ass hole. You are part of the problem. 
Akron is an FBS program -- the third winnable FBS game JMU has played in five years, mind you -- that looks an awful lot like a potential future conference game. If the Dukes go on the road and win in Ohio, that's the sign of a strong program capable of competing and winning at the FBS level. Of course, one win does not an FBS season make, but it's a big statement to the world that Harrisonburg, Va is ready to step up to a bigger stage.
On a larger scale? This season, JMU somehow has managed to snag more nationally televised TV games than any other CAA school. Must be a branding thing, because we certainly don't look better on paper in the preseason. Regardless, Bridgeforth needs to be electric. JMU must show up, stay put, be loud, and be proud to be wearing purple. These are the things that make the loudest statement about the health of our programs. JMU needs that support, now more than ever.
If these things happen, it sends the right messages to an Athletic Department that needs to see more student involvement to justify its big ideas. So put down your beer and remember to yell on third down. This stopped being about a football game a long time ago.

Friday, March 8, 2013

2013 CAA Tournament Primer

(The following is an expanded version of a piece appearing on CAAHoops, CAAZone, and other Colonial Athletic Association hubs around the internet.)

The CAA tournament is developing a nasty little reputation as what might be the best conference tournament in the country that nobody west of Appalachia knows about. And we're less than 24 hours from throwing this party all over again.

But first, let's recognize some realities. The CAA, as a mid-major brand, is losing ground just as fast as it gained it. VCU, a former staple of the Colonial postseason, is now an Atlantic 10 commodity and a nationwide household name. The shell that once was Old Dominion basketball has now played its final game as a Colonial Team. Georgia State is out the door as well, though coach Hunter once said after a game that he might stop in Richmond just to stare longingly at the Richmond Coliseum.

That's all prologue to the APR penalties leveled at UNCW and Towson. The Tigers, who just capped what is literally the greatest single-year program turnaround in Division 1 men's basketball history, would have as good a shot as anyone at hoisting the goods in Richmond on Monday night. Instead, both teams are sitting at home, stuck playing pick-up at the YMCA and watching Law and Order reruns.

With all those familiar faces gone, you might think this CAA tournament feels a little watered down.

Yeah, watered down with flaming vodka.

Remember how the 2012 NBA season felt, with its compressed regular season and streaky hot teams? Welcome to the 2013 CAA championship, where literally any team can win it all. How about the fightin' Sherrod Wrights, who have that one really good player... what's his name again? If seeding holds, Northeastern could win its first CAA tournament title in league history. Or maybe the Tribe can shoot their way past JMU and into the finals conversation. Hey, third times the charm, right? (Mark Selig disagrees.)

Speaking of JMU, all of Harrisonburg must have let out a sigh of relief when they saw how their Dukes were seeded. For a team that never seems to catch a break -- at least not in the Matt Brady era anyway -- they sure caught some in this year's tournament. Teams on JMU's side of the 7-team bracket are a combined 0-5 against the Dukes this season, while 1-seed Northeastern, 4-seed Mason, and 5-seed Drexel are 4-1 against the Purple and Gold.

Does Murphy's Law have a converse? That's right, some of us paid attention in high school Geometry.

I don't typically find myself comparing NCAA basketball to FIFA soccer tournaments, but how about the Group of Death that's been created for the aforementioned Patriots, Dragons, and Huskies? Drexel split with George Mason during the regular season, so we're looking for a Round 3 tiebreaker... and, oh yeah, whoever wins the inevitable slugfest receives the unenviable task of upstaging Northeastern. Yeah, good luck with that one boys.

Truth be told though, the Huskies have looked a lot more mortal through the latter stages of the season. Though it looked almost indomitable in jumping out to a 12-1 start, Northeastern finished the season 2-3. Some people say it's not how you start, it's how you finish.

I don't know anyone that actually says that, but if I run into one in the next 48 hours, I'll be sure to ask them who they've got Sunday night. My guess is they'll bet against the Huskies. Old habits die hard.

Say what you want about the Huskies, but at least they have that first-round bye. Who knows what kind of factor fatigue could play in semifinal matchups.

And while we're on the topic of first-round byes, Delaware will play Hofstra in the opening round on Saturday!

No, I kid. A lot of fans are actually writing off the Pride this tournament, as the sort of exception that proves the "any team could win it" rule. But I'm here to tell you, don't count out the Pride. In their last three games, they handled ODU, nearly upended Delaware but lost by 1, and had Towson on the ropes down in Maryland, leading by as much as 10 early on before losing a close one 67-64. There's no question they could potentially make some noise in the CAA tournament.

Just like every other 20-something with a sports blog, I've got my opinions on who will take this year's tourney. But the truth is that this tournament is nothing short of a basketball equation shrouded in 100% Grade A American sports enigma. Anything can happen. That coveted auto-bid is as up for grabs as it ever was.

One things for certain, going into Saturday's opening rounds. There's only two types of basketball fans who'll be watching the CAA tournament this weekend:

People who have no idea what's going to happen, and bold-faced liars.






Round-by-Round Predictions

Now that I've postured about how this year's conference tourney is wildly unpredictable, I'm gonna work my magic and, well, predict it. If you need to familiarize yourself with the 2013 iteration of the conference bracket, you can find the link over at CAAsports.


Round 1:

George Mason vs Drexel:  Quick! Name a player from George Mason that isn't named Sherrod Wright!

Okay fine, I've used the same joke like ten times this season. But it's a classic, so why switch it up midseason? The painful truth for Fairfax Community College here is that any team that can lock down Sherrod Wright can lock down George Mason. The Patriots can go big(ish) in response to that type of gameplan, but the fact is that the Patriots are woefully inconsistent against teams that lock down the star junior guard. Drexel is one such team that matches up well.

Now, I want to give some credit to GMU here. They fought through a bad matchup to win in Philadelphia for a season split with Drexel. But I don't think lightning can strike twice. Drexel is finally starting to get healthy again, and Bruiser Flint is, in my humblest of opinions, the better coach here. So I'm taking the Dragons in an ugly, borderline unwatchable game.

Pick: Drexel


Delaware vs Hofstra: Look, Bruce Willis wasn't the only one that was a good boy scout. I did my good turn and pumped up the Pride. Ra-ra, black sheep, and something about corn. Or whatever.

I meant what I said -- I think Hofstra could potentially make some noise. Doesn't mean I'm picking them.

Pick: Delaware


JMU vs William & Mary: There's some stuff you just can't explain, like those weird winter rings around Richmond rocks near Belle Isle, how women make decisions, or what the hell type of planetary body Pluto is supposed to be. Equally deserving of belonging on this list: what goes through AJ Davis' head when he steps on a court with Marcus Thornton.

I know Davis has been lot the last half a dozen games of the season, but when he's played against the Pantless Griffins, he's just been downright stupid. Davis set a season-high with 27 the first time he played the Tribe this year, including shooting an Olympian 70% from behind the arc... and for an encore, all he managed was to drop a career-high 36 last weekend, the second-best individual scoring game of an CAA player all season, and more or less single handedly won the game for JMU. And if that sentence was a run-on, well, that's basically the only way to handle writing about AJ Davis right now. Load up on amphetamines and go from there.

Being a senior that has lived through some of the stuff that I have -- like, say, the CAA tournament's all-time greatest individual performance, just off the top of my head -- William & Mary scares the tar out of me. Moreso, in fact, than Delaware and Northeastern do, if we're being honest.

I felt rather foolish feeling that, to be honest. Until I told that to assistant coach and longtime Matt Brady mentor Mike Deane, and he didn't laugh me out of the room. So, hey! There's a win. Or at least a not-loss.

Whatever mythical deities AJ Davis is sacrificing small petting zoo animals to, KEEP DOING IT. IT'S WORKING. AND I'M SORRY I SAT NEXT TO YOU ON THE BUS THAT ONE TIME ALL AWKWARDLY WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING. TOTALLY WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.

Pick: JMU


Round 2: Semifinals

Drexel vs Northeastern: I really believe this game will be close. Drexel took NU to overtime in Philly early in the season, and they are a vastly superior team now than they were then. Look for Drexel to go big and pound the boards against a Huskies team that doesn't rebound particularly well -- though in their defense, their poor boarding numbers are largely a function of their great field goal percentage.

It's a shame this year's Drexel squad went through what it did. Injuries aside, it could have been a special team that sought vengeance for what I believe was a bit of an NCAA at large snub last year. Still, even with a retooled strategy and some momentum coming into the postseason, the Dragons run will end here. Northeastern shoots the ball, spreads the floor, and unlike Mason, ultimately has too many potential weapons out on the court at any given moment.

Pick: Northeastern


Delaware vs JMU: It would probably be a bit of an overstatement to say that JMU owns Delaware, but the chickens sure didn't pose much of a threat to the Dukes in Harrisonburg, and it's gonna require years of therapy to scratch the impression of Moore-to-Nation from the minds of those unfortunate souls clad in blue. Rest in Peace, old Joe Flacco. You were so much easier to make fun of.

While Rayshawn Goins almost definitely will not be a factor in the fast-pace, run-the-floor first round W&M game, I expect Goins to have a huge game should JMU and Delaware advance to play each other in the semi's. We're talking 15 & 15, maybe more. As Davis has gotten hot, teams have slowly started to forget about game-planning for Goins. The redshirt senior has owned Jamelle Hagins this season. Meanwhile, his teammate and fellow third team all-CAA honoree Devon Moore will likely lock down CAA leading scorer Devon Saddler in the second half with an effort level that could range anywhere from "swimming the English Channel in March" to "blowing up the second death star."

If Delaware wins this game, honestly, I'm not shocked. The Chicks have loads of offensive talent and are deserving of that second seed. But I've got a Kemba-wins-the-national-championship type of feeling here, and I'm gonna remain a homer. Unashamed.

Pick:  JMU


Round 3: Championship Matchup

Northeastern vs JMU: If you've been over to get JMUSB's take on this -- and I highly recommend you do, because they're great guys and, unlike me, totally grounded in realism -- you probably already know where this is going.

I've been saying it since about 9:01 PM on February 20. JMU played Northeastern to a draw in Boston; I've gotta think the table turns in our favor playing a championship matchup in Virginia. AJ Davis is on a role, JMU has seniors out the ass, and if prompted to actually play for something meaningful, I think the Dukes might actually find a higher gear than they've played with in my four years of being in Harrisonburg. Northeastern is a great team and they're guaranteed an NIT bid -- a tournament which they stand a great chance at winning. But similar to the last three Big East tournament champions, I think all signs point toward JMU stepping into the light just at the right moment and capturing lightning in a bottle.

Pick: JMU, 68-66.




I'll be neck-deep in press releases, statistics, and JMU baseball (wait, what?) for most of the weekend, but hit me on twitter with reactions. Get in on the discussion, and make sure you hash tag #caahoops.

And for more analysis regarding the CAA tournament than this lone ranger can provide you, sidle on over to caahoops.com and my friends there will hit you from all angles. Seriously, you'll be so overloaded with information and analysis, you'll almost wish you hadn't gone there at all.

Almost. But not quite. Stop being such a fifth grader, you L7 weeny.